In decades of covering politics, I’ve heard a lot of baloney. But I don’t think I’ve ever heard as much as I have on the subject of septic tanks.

The narrative goes like this: because proponents of consolidation promised to eliminate septic tanks throughout the consolidated city, but didn’t, taxpayers today must pay billions to do the job. The reason septic tanks have to be eliminated is because they are ruining the local waterways and are a dire health hazard.

Some of this narrative is what an old political reporter used to call “heifer dust.” The rest is woefully lacking in factual support.

I covered the consolidation effort from its inception. I never heard any proponent promise anyone that all septic tanks would be replaced, and certainly not that it would be done at no cost to the homeowner.

What the Blueprint for Improvement outlining consolidation did say is that the problem of expanding the sewer system would be expensive to fix but that savings from combining duplicate services would make it easier.

Since then, the city has added 740 miles of sewer lines throughout the 840 square miles of Duval County, acquired old private systems and built sewage treatment plants, shutting off more than 70 outfalls that dumped raw sewage into the St. Johns River. That doesn’t support the “nothing has been done” story.

Here is part of a recent Facebook post from City Council Member Matt Carlucci, whose father was on the first council after consolidation:

“For decades, one of Jacksonville’s most important quality-of-life challenges has been replacing failing septic tanks and extending sewer service to neighborhoods that have waited far too long for these basic improvements.

When Jacksonville consolidated more than 50 years ago, there was a commitment to bring infrastructure improvements to all parts of our city. Over the decades, Jacksonville has invested hundreds of millions of dollars in septic tank phaseout and related infrastructure projects. But the need was so extensive, and remains so today, and the costs so significant, that many neighborhoods were still waiting for relief. The challenge has never been a lack of commitment. It has simply been a very large and expensive undertaking.

In 2020, my dear friend, former Mayor and Council Member Tommy Hazouri, and I worked together to place an additional $100 million in the Capital Improvement Program to accelerate septic tank phaseout and related infrastructure projects. Tommy was passionate about improving quality of life for families in these neighborhoods, and I have no doubt he would be smiling today as this important work continues.

I am especially proud of the JEA septic tank phaseout team led by Greg Corcoran. I’ve seen firsthand the difference this work makes in people’s lives. For families finally connected to modern sewer service, the improvement in quality of life can be immediate and dramatic.

I am also thankful that Mayor Donna Deegan, who coincidentally is Tommy Hazouri’s cousin, has made this work a priority by front-loading additional funding in her upcoming budget for infrastructure improvements such as septic tank phaseout so more residents can benefit sooner.”

Matt has gray hair but he was a kid when consolidation happened. He’s honest and sincere, but maybe his memory is a bit hazy about what happened then, and since.

There were about 50,000 septic tanks scattered about Duval County in 1970.

By the end of 2023, the government had issued permits for 46,000 more of these dangerous devices – unleashing them upon the unsuspecting and utterly sacrosanct environment. Some years more than 2,000 permits were issued.

Why would they do that?

Indeed, why would more than 2.9 million septic tanks be issued throughout the Sunshine State during that time and why would the state declare them to be perfectly suitable when cited and maintained properly?

Now that millions of dollars have been spent to install all those septic tanks, the intelligentsia in City Hall wants to pay billions to dig them up and throw them away.

This is the equivalent of paying people to dig holes and then paying other people to fill them up.

Where is the environmental damage that is so lamented? Who has been charged with damaging the environment? There have been almost no criminal cases filed against homeowners for failing to maintain their septic tanks in the past 10 years, although more than 2,000 cleanup orders have been issued.

Until 10 years ago, homeowners had to pay to remove their own septic tanks, which essentially were part of the plumbing system of their homes.

But compassionate city officials, who are very generous with Other People’s Money, decided to give thousands of homeowners shiny, brand new septic tanks at no cost.

Merry Christmas!

Since then, more than $100 million has been spent to uproot septic tanks, which the media was exulting over this week. Nothing thrills them more than higher taxes and wanton spending.

Jacksonville taxpayers can only cross their fingers and hope the local government doesn’t decide to give every home in Jacksonville a free new roof and a paint job next year.

“Quality of life,” you know. Also, elections are scheduled.