Out of all the silly things City Council recently passed, Jacksonville Today decided to promote four specific bills in one of their morning email blasts.

All four disappoint me.

Up first: The city is going to pay some random company from Coral Gables to find three potential locations to build a new jail. Apparently, Council members are incapable of doing that and people working for CGL Management are – for $750,000.

While council members are unsure of where the jail should go, they are definitely sure of where it shouldn’t go – historically marginalized areas. Which is college talk for “hood,” a.k.a: Jacksonville’s Eastside.

Word on the street – and by street, I mean City Council Chambers – is that everyone is really concerned the jail will move from its location in a “historically marginalized area” to another “historically marginalized area” a few blocks away.

So much so, Councilman Jimmy Peluso, whose district includes a historically marginalized area, held a meeting in December to discuss legislation preventing the city from including certain neighborhoods as potential location sites.

Peluso said he just wants to make sure Jacksonville doesn’t recreate “sins of the past.”

All political performative nonsense.

The Jacksonville Justice Center’s potential site needs to be huge. At least 500 acres?????

The councilman understands size does matter.

CGL Management has until the end of the year to pick a spot, well, three spots, and report back to the mayor’s office. Then Jacksonville’s Democrat mayor and republican sheriff will narrow it down to one for City Council’s final approval.  

Up next: Council celebrates the quick and easy demolition of MOSH’s 58-year-old building on the Southbank while hoping we don’t notice how hard it is rebuild on the Northbank for $141 million.

The Museum of Science and History’s move to the Northbank is supposed to be one of many cultural triumphs in the revitalization of downtown Jacksonville.

However, it ain’t going so good.

The CEO quit, groundbreaking construction was pushed back six months, and after five years of effort – funding is still about $45 million short.

But, who cares, right? MOSH’s new design renderings are out! Yeah!

After scrolling through the photos, the new MOSH looks a lot like a fancier version of the old MOSH. Which has sucked since the Currents of Time.

Third: City Council gave away $5 million in public funding so a private developer can build a 240-unit “mixed-income” (whatever that means) apartment building on Beach Boulevard.

Council Member Peluso is Mr. Not in My District when it comes to the jail, but turns into Mr. We Need to Do More when it comes to building cheap government funded apartment blocks outside his district. 

And last: Council member Michael Boylan’s truancy penalty bill passed. Yes, it’s exactly what it sounds like – a governing body installing guardrails to make sure its own members show up. Now, council members need a note from their doctor or drill sergeant to miss a meeting.

What did we learn today, class?

When the work gets hard, hire a consultant. When showing up gets hard, pass a bill.

That’s Jacksonville leadership 101.

Class dismissed.